Traquill in Unicorn of Death (1_42)

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Birthday Greetings

Anna M.C.
Vector's Monocle


From: Marko The Sidekick
Subject: Birthday Greetings for Usagi the Bunny Girl


Well, if it isn't my favorite bunny girl's birthday. Sure, I like your 47 brothers and sisters a lot, too, but you're really something special. General Claire tells me you're becoming pretty handy with a sword. Keep it up, and after a couple more birthdays you're going to be a great warrior like Erik. As opposed to an insignificant, overlooked sidekick like me. Not that I don't like my job, mind you. I mean, the pay is . . . um . . . but you know, the working conditions are . . . ah, well, the opportunities for advancement are . . .

Actually, it does stink, doesn't it?

Anyway, I just wanted to be sure to send you a special greeting. I've been trying all day to think of exactly what to write, and then it hit me. Why, I asked myself, does everyone still seem to like Dirk better than Erik and me even though Dirk's the scum of the earth? It's his poetry, that's why. Everyone's a sucker for a good poem, right? Since I've always considered communication one of my biggest strengths (besides lifting heavy objects, that is), I decided to try my hand at one myself. Ahem:

There once was a girl named Usagi.
Neither kitten, nor birdie, nor froggie
Was cute as our bun. No, not even one! --
Except maybe Woje the doggie.

Sorry. Ariel made me put in that last bit.

Wish I could make it to Monigold for your party tonight. I always feel so comfortable there, for some reason. But duty calls -- well, actually, Erik calls, but it's pretty much the same thing, isn't it? No matter. Who'd want to spend the night dancing and eating carrot cake when he could be hunting down a Blood Beast in the Howling Hills?

Have a happy birthday without me. If anyone needs me tomorrow, I'll be at home filling out job applications.

A very disgruntled,

From: Usagi (Macy Starkey)
Subject: My Birthday

Thank you every one for wishing me a happy birthday.

I am so sorry i got this out so late but Oh well ::sigh:: I had a very good birthday though, but instead of a carrot cake I had a chocolate one which was very yummy indeed. So thank you all.

Everyone's fave. little bunny



From: Dirk Blackpool
Subject: Macy's Birthday Greetings


Well, Macy, it seems that once again Marko has escaped my dungeon, but not without leaving behind a certain scroll he had in his possession. Obviously I had to open and read it to make sure it wasn’t another list of spies of Baaldorf and Greystone. Unfortunately, it’s just a natal day greeting to you. Since the information seems harmless, I’m sending this along to you . . .


Prince Dirk Blackpool

*The contents of the large, rolled parchment scroll (with its red, wax seal broken open) read as follows...*

Hello Macy,

I just wanted to send along a greeting for a very happy birthday to you. I’ve finally got some time off from hanging out with Prince Erik for awhile. I made a little trip up north which really didn’t turn out as well as I’d planned. Story of my life.

Anyway, Uncle Traquill was asking about you the other day since it seems you have some experience as a magician’s assistant. He’s getting sort of old and could use some help. He’s got some great routines worked up. One with a rabbit being pulled out of Vector’s (the next word is smeared with a small ink blob, making it illegible). And I sure wouldn’t mind seeing you in those interesting costumes. It would brighten up the castle a bit. Well, once I get back to it. Shouldn’t be a problem for the strongest man in Aperans, huh?

I hope you’ll accept Uncle Traquil’s offer. The pay’s not great, but you can hang out with me and Erik. Well, when we’re not off fighting that (the word that follows is suspiciously obliterated with a strategically placed blob of black ink) Dirk Blackpool. And I think my uncle is going to take his show on the road. So, you’d get to see Aperans too. Nice bonus.

Well, I’ve gotta run. Hopefully I’ll see you soon. Have some carrot cake for me and Ben, OK? He loves carrot cake.



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